I have never liked being placed on a pedestal. I dislike being thought of as someone who is very hard to reach, as someone who is almost perfect, as someone whose life is maybe so fun to live. I just don’t understand why people assume that they know me well when in reality they don’t. They think of me as this and that, and they place me on a pedaestal so high that they don’t even want to try to know me better. I don’t like how people distance themselves away from me because they assume that talking to me is nearly impossible. Lame excuses.
It may not seem like it but I have been a victim of misjudgment. Sometimes I wonder how different my life could be if I looked differently from the way I look now. Life would probably be a bit easier without all those fake people crowding around pretending to be a friend. Gone would be those judging eyes that don’t let even my tiniest actions pass.
There are times when I wish I was someone else, that I was seen differently by others. There are times when I wonder how different it could have been and how easier it would have been to let myself be known to them without any apprehension from their side. No one would assume that I wouldn’t be their friend, or that I was hard to reach.
I have never liked the idea of being branded as a “dream girl”, “ideal girl”, “Ms. Perfect” or anything else of that sort. It’s like people are telling you that you are perfect, when you know deep inside that you are not. It’s like they are confining you to a very secluded box wherein you cannot commit any mistake or else they will talk about you behind their back. It’s like telling you that you are their standard. To make things worse, they don’t even try to reach out to you because to them, you are universes apart. You know, sometimes it all gets a little too much. Beauty does not ensure happiness all the time. And more than that, it does not ensure you of immunity from all the isolation the world has to offer.
This was my 19-year old self talking. Fast forward to three years later, I have now learned from the constant judgment I have received in the past. I admit, I was a bit negative on how I handled certain things before, but I’m here to tell you that the judgments thrown at me have helped shape me into who I am now. I’m here to tell you that you are not alone in being a subject to others’ scrutinizing eyes. I’ve been there and I still undergo it every once in a while, but I have found the courage to convert it into something positive.
For those who are judged: Never let false judgments affect you and make you weak. Allow them to serve as your strength and show them who you really are or what you are capable of doing. Take into heart what makes you you and don’t apologize for being real. Know your limits, know your boundaries, and know how to react properly.
For those who easily judge others: You are unintentionally (and maybe intentionally for some) causing emotional damage to a person. Even Jesus never judged a person in the old times based on his past, present, or future. He even encourages us never to judge other people (Matthew 7:1-5). Before spurting out anything, try to imagine yourself if it was you who was being judged.
When the world throws many stones, you don’t need to avoid them. You don’t even need to catch them. Just let the world throw whatever it can throw at you. Catch them, if you will. Know for sure that whatever happens, you know yourself best and that you will come out stronger.