On this day, last week, I ended a session with my high school girls in our final club meeting for the school year. It was also the last time I’d be handling the seniors, the batch that first welcomed me in this new and exciting world of being a Club Moderator. We were teary eyed, and we hugged a lot before leaving the classroom.
Two years and 0% confidence ago, I was invited by a high school in Makati to be a moderator of a shiny new club they formed to give more options for their students: a fashion club! I don’t have a teaching background but being a teacher was one of my childhood dreams so although I was reluctant, I still went for it.
Meetings were held once a week, every Thursdays for one and a half hours. It seemed short, but boy was I in for a challenge! During my first weeks, I resorted to Power Point Presentations, well-researched “talks” with games, and getting guest speakers while trying to gauge what the students would appreciate and enjoy. I previously did talks in schools but nothing that was as regular as the new role given to me as a Club Moderator, so everything was still new to me. We saw each other weekly that sometimes I would run out of things to do or say. I would always end a class feeling unsatisfied and disappointed with myself. And unlike talks that last up to 3 hours max, being a Club Moderator was not just about sharing and imparting knowledge– it was also about building relationships.
I don’t know how or when, but after several sessions of creating accessories (which I found out was their favorite activity), going on field trips, styling and watching documentaries, I found myself more and more comfortable with the classroom set-up. I discovered myself more and learned about my weaknesses that included being painfully shy. But time and experience gave me the confidence to conduct my classes and really talk with the girls. It was a club after all, not a serious academic class where I had to be strict with rules and my “lesson plan”.
I remember a session this year when my girls huddled around me while they deconstructed their t-shirts and the others went carefree and danced to The Vamps’ rendition of Oh Cecilia as their background music. We talked about high school things like prom and getting into a good college and laughed about the most random things.. I felt like an ate giving my own piece of advice or telling them about my own teenage stories.
I know I have a long way to go to be good in this field, but at least I’ve made the first step which is to open my doors to possibilities. Don’t be afraid to try new things especially if it’s something that your heart feels like doing ever since. It doesn’t matter if you’re not good at it now, nobody is really fully prepared when they start anyway. The only difference between you and that girl living your dream is she took the plunge. Go for it! And then share your story.