I’ve been working as a writer for a private company for more than a month now. I love writing. I really do enjoy it. However, when writing becomes a job, sometimes, I run out of things to write and need some rest from thinking and sorting different ideas to come up with contents. I stumbled upon a post suggesting to write yourself an evaluation when you are bored at work. And it just made complete sense to me.
So a week ago, I chatted with the CEO of the company I’m working for. He usually checks and edits my day-to-day work for it to be posted on his social media account for the brand-building of the company and his stand in the industry. We sat and talked casually of the parts that I have to improve base on my performance for the past week. And there were so many things that were pointed out for my past and recent outputs. But I took everything as constructive criticisms and admitted that I still have a lot to learn.
Hence, that was just what I needed. Though I dreaded that moment that I have to sit with the boss and talk to him, it was more than helpful for me. After that discussion, I sat quietly and re-evaluated myself.
Don’t we all reach this point?
I sometimes get the feeling of self-doubt and discontentment with my outputs and all. I know to myself that there is still something I can do or I can give to make it all better but I can’t put my finger on it. I can’t help being disappointed with myself. My friends would cheer me up saying there are ways for me to make it up, and it was all in a day’s work, but that feeling in my gut tells me that I am not good enough crushes my soul.
I know I am just starting up, I just graduated this year, and I am still searching for the path that I really want to take. If I am to evaluate myself and my life right now, it will be a mark of “ok” in red ink with a huge circle on it. Because maybe I need to tell myself that it’s okay- it’s okay to make mistakes as long as you learn from it. It’s okay to be tired, but be sure to never stop for the things that you want, that you aim for, that you’ve been dreaming of.
The “it’s okay” we need the most must come from ourselves. It has to start inside, the acceptance that we will not always win, but we can always fight a good fight. There is no use to feel sorry for yourself; rather, forgive yourself, and give it another chance, another shot, another try. That is when you can go on. Our failures will only hold us back if we let it.
For everyone, especially my fellow millennials who are just starting out with life, here’s a note: it is tough to find a starting point and begin a journey that you know so little about. But finishing a journey starts with a single step. You can leap, jump, walk, tip-toe or even crawl– whatever it is, as long as you take that step, do it!
We all can have that “Ok!” rating. We’ll be okay.