I’m in the process of picking fragments of my heart and discovering free and requited love.
Not that kind of love we sweetheartily giddy about. But the love which life offers wide open, and of which, I can only be grateful.
When loss upon loss has been part of your journey, it will scar bone-deep in every inch of your being. And it seems the only response to heal is to be estranged and invisible. Take heart, because many people will not understand you. But it’s all okay, we are entitled to our own pain. Don’t give them the permission to disqualify you to the process of healing.
These days, I’m in this mixed state of emotions which leads me to the discovery of and surrender to the unknown.
I am in joyous state that makes me appreciate the beauty of being lonely. I am accepting new beginnings that I am learning to leave grieving, one day at a time. I am discovering my life’s (new) purpose. I am starting to dream again. And I know through these, I am honoring the loving memories of my parents, who wanted nothing for me but to live the fullest of life. I am in the process of learning who I want to be again.
I came to know that there’s so much to life than the pursuit of happiness.
When the world deludes us with a false concept of happiness, we miss our gift of purpose. Everything is meaningless (Ecclesiastes 1). As we go through life, we realize that happiness is not the places or how many of it you travel to BUT how they will leave traces of grace to your soul, not the achievements you attained BUT how you bring back the glory to God, not even how many people “you think” you helped BUT doing it for the genuine deep sense of purpose, not the greatness of your talents and skills BUT how we use them to honor God, not how many relatives or friends you have BUT how many of these blood kins and mates truly care, not to get even with people who treat you badly BUT how you overcome not to be like them and when you know forgiveness is what matters, not your marital status or singleness but how you delight yourself to God in this season of waiting knowing that it’s still Him who owns tomorrow, how you discover light and fire and be that light to others especially to those who lose hope and grope around in the darkness, how you choose to be in a place where you feel wanted away from the people who take you for granted, how much you are willing to fight for what you believe in according to His principles. Happiness is knowing that we can only have true joy, not worldly happiness, by living a life acknowledging that everything is for God.
So live, live and do things that are true to who you are. Live and embrace life with faith, obedience, and purpose.
To all those who are still grieving, hurting, longing and moving on, “cry, Heart, but never break. Let your tears of grief and sadness help begin a new life.” (Death, Glenn Ringtved on loss and life). Remember you are a human feeling being. I am certain you feel deep because you love deep. Your pain is valid. Keep posting and sharing your hurts, if that is the process that will help you to heal. I’m in one with you because I will, still.
It’s not important what people think about your suffering BUT what God does with you in this season.
So go on, wounded heart. Find your lost. And find your way back.
Ecclesiastes 3: 1-8, 11
A Time for Everything
“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.
…He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.”